It would probably look something like this...
ISU down 2 with :03 to play. Shaggy is lining up for a 35 yard field goal from the right hash to win the game.
*sphincter is tight*
The kick is up...it's long enough...headed for the left upright. It clanks off the upright! Wait...it falls...hits the cross bar! And...it's...... GOOD!
*passes out*