If he's giving you a hard time, respond by giving him the speech his mother should have given him: "Son, are you sure about this? You can have a glass of milk without buying the whole cow."
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What i was getting at was determining if it was more like a first marriage than a second, if the guy lost his first wive ten years ago, and is your best friend, then maybe you should go to the wedding, just a buddy who is lining up his second divorce in 2 years, makes for a different scenario. The short notice does leave a lot of room for "sorry, had other plans made". Does he want you in the wedding?
My thoughts-
If I am not important enough to be in the wedding, then football>wedding.
I've been in 2 fall weddings (road games) so it wasn't quite as big of deal. Been invited to a bunch more, but didn't go. I get 6, maybe 7 days a year to enjoy an ISU fb game. May sound selfish but that's the way it is. If I am close enough to the people getting married to be in the wedding, I will gladly skip football to be there.
My wife has been a bridesmaid in 2 fall weddings that she told me right away I didn't have to be there. I went to football game, then went to the reception. Everyone was happy.
Ultimately, two questions you have to ask to answer this. First, how much does the person care (answer seems to be a lot). In that case, second question, how much would you care if you lost this person as a friend?
Don't get me wrong, that second question wasn't meant to push you into going, but it could go either way. To me, a guy getting married the 2nd time and he's pitching a hissy-fit over people who are making decisions based on standing plans is maybe a little self centered. On the other hand, if this guy left his dying mother's side to pick you up from the drunk tank in the morning a few years ago...maybe it's time to return the favor.
It all depends. There's not a whole lot of info there, but divorced 2 years, engaged 3 weeks ago and getting married on 9/29? Wondering if the guy is in love with being in love? Is he jumping in with both feet too soon and did he do that on the first one? At some point, depending on how close you are to them and what caliber of bullet they keep shooting themselves in the foot with, sometimes it's time to move on. I've made that decision with friends. Again, maybe there's not enough info there, but thought it could be a possibility.
The Big 12 schedule changes made this year really screwed my football season. I am in two weddings that were originally scheduled for away games. Don't know if they did this on purpose or just a coincidence. After the changes, they are both home games. I am in both so obviously going, but would go to these even if not in them.
Everyone has priorities. I may not understand why someone enjoys some activity but respect their opinions. One major one for me is ISU athletics. I will always send a gift, but if we aren't close then I won't be attending.
I understand that some may "have to have" fall weddings for whatever reason, but for anyone that grew up in Iowa or attending either school the ISU v Iowa game should absolutely be off limits. I learned this at a young age. My dad was the best man in his friends wedding (not from Iowa and has no Iowa ties). His wife died of cancer 20 years later and asked my dad to man the same position in an extremely small wedding. My dad explained to me that there would be some tough positions in life, but unless you are in a wedding that is the FIRST then you are not obligated to go. He did not and his friend understood.