Don't forget about LWO
RED and BLACK. i still remember Sting walking out white and black NWO on and ripping his shirt to reveal red and black. Badass. Although Konaan and X PAC were badass
Theme song was the ****.
I raised my hand and said "what's the big deal? My dad drinks and drives all the time."
She looked at me like I had antlers growing out of my head. She asked me what he was drinking....and I said, "he's always drinking Mountain Dew when he's driving." Got lots of laughs from the class but I seriously had no idea, not even sure I knew what alcohol was at the time.
I also remember wondering why girls always sat down to pee. I remember telling my kid sister that she should try peeing while standing up, and she insisted she couldn't do it.
I was about 5 years old and we were staying in a motel in Virginia. There was a "kid" staying there that was my height, but he had short arms, legs, and had a full beard. For some reason I was really freaked out with this first experience with a midget and had nightmares for weeks over this guy. Now, I get excited whenever I see one.
I used to stay with my grandparents for two weeks every summer. My grandpa and I would get up and go fishing early every day. He used to get horrible leg cramps in the mornings. As we were eating breakfast and getting ready he used to complain about the Charlie horses he was having. I used to always be a little weirded out by it because up until about 12 years old I thought it meant to have a boner.
I was riding in the car with my parents and saw that someone had written "Give Head" in big letters on a blank billboard. I started laughing at how stupid that was. How would someone give a head and why would someone write it on a billboard. I thought it was such a stupid thing to do that it was hilarious. I just kept going on about it and laughing. Gradually I noticed that my parents seemed very uncomfortable and I realized that it must mean something dirty.
Between condo/condom, Cedar Rapids/See the rabbits, and the sanitary napkins, I have two family stories and one family friend story that are nearly identical. Weird.
I remember not quite understanding how my mom was from northern Indiana, but how she went to college in southern Illinois. Didn't understand that you stayed overnight at college for long periods of time.
When I was three or four, I was riding in the car with my dad, and he legally turned right at a red stoplight. I said "Dad, red means stop." My dad obviously couldn't explain in detail what he did, so he pretty much summed it up with that he knew red meant stop, but that sometimes it was okay to go on a red light. There's a pause, and in a sing-songy voice I said "You're gonna get in trouble."
My sister was already in preschool at the age of three for some speech problems she had. My dad was trying to hustle home after Sunday evening service at church to watch the Bears game, and he gets pulled over. We're waiting for the officer to come up to the window, and my sister turns around in her seat and starts waving at the police car. My mom hisses at my sister asking what she's doing and to turn around and sit down. She replies "But in school, they told us policemen are our friends."
Not so much something I didn't understand, but back in the day, when Gore Tex was just gaining popularity, I remember being in the back seat of my parent's car, talking about what I wanted for a gift, and I said I wanted one of those coats with the Kotex lining. Parents scolded me, saying I shouldn't say that, and we spent like 2 straight minutes with me adamantly trying to explain that it was a thing, and my parents telling me I shouldn't be saying that...finally I decided that...whatever...I'll just stop talking, they're morons...was a couple days later that I thought about what we were arguing about and realized my mistake.
It pales in comparison to the time my mom dropped my brother off at the mall while she and I went to a Dr's appointment. She took a call at the Dr. (before cell phones)...we left quickly, headed to a store a block or two from the mall....yeah...my brother got caught trying to boost a nudie mag...and not Playboy, something like Hustler or something.
Probably plenty more jokes I didn't get as a kid and will never know I missed.
I have an brother 2 yr older than me, but his birthday is after mine on the calendar. I really didn't understand how this could be possible. He was born before me right? So, his birthday should be before mine! It was the only thing that made sense.