Find your "Iowa Barbie" at your nearby toy store (Pics now included)

[guitarchitect7]

Mattel recently announced the release of limited-edition Barbie Dolls for Iowa:



1.

'West Des MoinesBarbie'

This princess Barbie is sold only in West Glen at Jordan Creek .. She comes with

anassortment of Kate Spade Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired foreign dog

named Honey and a cookie-cutter house. Available with or without tummy tuck and

face lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with the augmented version.



2. ' Ankeny Barbie ' (recently moved from east side)

The modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full-time occupation. Still goes back to

the east side for doctor appointments, shopping, bakery, dairy queen, weddings, and funerals Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.



3.

' FairgroundsBarbie'

This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9 mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only available after dark

and must be paid for in cash (preferably small, untraceable bills) unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about. Fairgrounds Barbie comes with the Barbie East-side dream-shack that has an extra large front yard for Clive Barbie to park her Hummer on for $20 per day each August.


4. ' Urbandale Barbie'

This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card, and country club membership. Alsoavailable for this set are Shallow Closeted Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.



5.

'Knoxville Barbie'

This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR t-shirt and Tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.




6.

' Kellogg Barbie'

This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out ofRavenna Barbie's

house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through halter-top - also included is her Wal-Mart employee smock. Also available with a mobile home.



7.

'ISU ProfessorBarbie'

This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair,arch-less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call

her Willow . She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Sherman Hill Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free. This is Zipp's favorite, he loves hairy pits


8.

'Waterloo Barbie'

She is just looking for all three of her baby daddies. Set comes with baby Nieshia and baby Twanna. Optional accessories include a GED and bus pass to get to Aldi's. Gangsta Ken and his 1979 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.


9.

'Boone Barbie'

....need we say more? Pabst Blue Ribbon sold separately.

[jdoggivjc]

I've seen this before only it wasn't Des Moines-related...

[brianhos]

East siders moving to Ankeny? I have not seen that yet....

[4429 mcc]

East siders moving to Ankeny? I have not seen that yet....

Look closer....they're sneaky

[The_Architect]

This is old and is out of date. Urbandale is no longer yuppie - it's total WT.

[rworkman83]

'Boone Barbie'

....need we say more? Pabst Blue Ribbon sold separately.

Um really? That doesn't describe Boone at all...

[brianhos]

Ohh western urbandale is pretty yuppie, go across the interstate, it is pretty kush out there.

[The_Architect]

Ohh western urbandale is pretty yuppie, go across the interstate, it is pretty kush out there.

True, but I don't consider that Urbandale.
Have you seen the HS lately? Talk about run down...

[rworkman83]

I'm still not seeing the pictures either...

[4429 mcc]

This is old and is out of date. Urbandale is no longer yuppie - it's total WT.

Polk County Urbandale true or Dallas County Urbandale false?

[The_Architect]

Polk County Urbandale true or Dallas County Urbandale false?

Polk County Urbandalte = WT
Dallas County Urbandale = comparable to Country Club area in WDM.

[brianhos]

Um really? That doesn't describe Boone at all...

They cannot afford pabst in boone, I think it is just the white can that says beer.

[TxCycloneFan]

East siders moving to Ankeny? I have not seen that yet....

When did you move there?

[whirlybirds]

anybody got links to the pics since they no longer work. being from good ol knoxville, i really wanted to see my barbie

[4429 mcc]

anybody got links to the pics since they no longer work. being from good ol knoxville, i really wanted to see my barbie

I think I saw her picking up food stamps!