As a friend of the Vallier family, I attended the ceremony and the reception. A lot has happened since then - for starters, the divorce - but I still remember how hurt many of those in attendance were at how the couple treated us.
Out of respect for Jane and Fred, many of us presented Traci and Robb with what we considered lovely presents. Now, we did this out of respect - not because we wanted to necessarily be thanked. However, polite people do say "thank you," and I must say that Traci and Robb eventually did - with a generic xeroxed letter 16 months later that did not mention any specific present or have any personal comments in it. Instead, the note mentioned how busy they both were and how they finally had time to say a generic thanks for "all of the presents." I think that the word for this is "tacky," and many people who put considerable time and care into the selection of their presents were quite hurt.
At the reception - which was at the Memorial Union on the ISU Campus - there was no reception line, so many of us in attendance never had the opportunity to meet Traci and wish her and Robb well. Jane and Fred commented later that Traci and Robb decided they did not want to have to stand there and shake hands with all of those people, many of whom Traci did not know. In addition, in the Great Hall, where the reception meal was held, the bridal party sat on a raised area surrounded by security guards who would not let anyone approach any of the attendants, much less the couple. So, those of us who wanted to introduce ourselves to Traci were unable to do so.
The ceremony itself was at 1st Methodist Church. Neither Traci nor Robb was a Christian, so their choice to have a church-based ceremony was a curious one. Jane and Fred commented that they had searched for the most beautiful place in town so as to have the best pictures. Many of us were shocked - in all honesty - that the pastor of the church would rent out the space for a ceremony that was not Christian in nature. We suspected that he succumbed to the worship of celebrity that is so pervasive in our society and simply could not resist this opportunity to be close to fame. The ceremony itself was sweet, particularly the part that celebrated how many years the parents and grandparents of the couple had been married. Unfortunately, much of the talk afterwards was not centered on our best wishes for the happiness of the couple but, instead, on the speculation of whether the bridesmaids had on any underwear.
Because of all of this, many of us wondered why they bothered to invited us to what is typically one of the most memorable days in a life when they did not even know us - or even care to know us. It became quickly clear that we were not co-celebrants in the occasion. Instead, we were just their audience for their over-the-top show. For those of us who had known Robb since he was a child, this was a painful experience. We at least expected better from Jane and Fred, even if Traci and Robb were caught up in their 15 minutes of fame.
Most random first post ever?
Gotta love thread necromancy... :err:
I remember tailgating with and meeting Traci once. She was really really nice, and seemed to be enjoying the chaos. I was such an ignorant college kid back then that at the time I actually did not know who she was!
Dude...let it go
I'm sure you're a nice guy, but as somebody who wrote hundreds of thank you's a few years ago for wedding presents to people I really didn't know... well I thought it was a dumb tradition and every gift I give for a wedding includes a note telling them not to send me a thank you because by #150 you'll hate it. You didn't expect a thank you, but whe you didn't get one you liked you were upset? What?
Also, chances are the parents invited you to the wedding. That happens a lot. I had a lot of those folks on our guest list, and while I was thankful they could join us and I met everyone joyfully some people want their wedding to be all about them and I don't fault them for it.
Also, this whole thread is pretty random. OP, were you just researching Traci Bingham or how did this come up?
Now this is a wedding tradition I can get behind.Quote:
speculation of whether the bridesmaids had on any underwear.