James Bond delivered my fuel oil last night

**Phaedrus** · 07-30-2008, 08:32 AM

One of the joys of leaving my rented house, is getting the fuel oil tank filled.

So, this being Germany, and nothing being simple, I spent the last week making arrangements for delivery, and went home early from week last night, and waited expectantly from 4-5 for the oil driver. Of course, he is late, because there is a lightning storm, and as anyone could tell you, pumping fuel during a lightning storm is one of those "bad" things you don't want to do.

So he shows up at 6:30, for which I am grateful, and immediately begins preparing to fill the tanks. He puts in the hose, and then takes this doo-dad, which is the same size and relative shape of an, ummm, device which is phallic in nature, pushes the tip of it with his thumb, goes over to the tanks, pushes it again, and then puts it on the windowsill.

Fuel oil immediately rushes into the tank, and being curious, I approach and look closely at the device. It is weighted on the bottom, and a red light is flashing on the tip. In my somewhat limited German, I ask him about it, and evidently, it is an RF controller for the fuel pumping operation.

He put it up against the tank, because it samples the density of the empty tank. He put it on the windowsill, so it could still "see" the tank and still send RF to the truck outside (the walls are ancient and several feet of stone). If the line breaks, it has a limiter that will automatically turn off the pump. The device can also "see" how full the tanks are getting. Plus, if you knock the device over, it will shut off the pump.

The buttons on the tip can also be set for flow rate, on/off and when you hit the outside two, a receipt for the fuel, with the latest downloaded fuel price is printed out in the cab of the fuel truck.

Dude. The only thing he was missing was the tuxedo and the Aston Martin. I never thought that being a fuel-oil pumper could be "cool". The guys who ran the truck back when I was a kid were the dirtiest, oiliest, worst-smelling guys you ever met, and this guy didn't even get close to the fumes.

**IcSyU** · 07-30-2008, 08:35 AM

Maybe the tux was under his attire

**BigM** · 07-30-2008, 05:33 PM

did u check the make on the truck?

**Cydar** · 07-30-2008, 05:51 PM

Hmmm. Sounds like Q is working for them.

So which Bond was it?
Sean Connery
David Nivens
George Lazenby
Roger Moore
Timothy Dalton
Pierce Brosnan
Daniel Craig

My name is Man. Oil Delivery Man.
I'll have a martini. Shaken. Not stirred...