Parenting Question

**CycloneNick** · 07-19-2009, 02:12 PM

So we're expecting our first child anytime now and I spent some time today going through my music library and sanitizing it for his little ears.

I was wondering where everyone else stood on what they let their kids hear.
I've pretty much removed all rap with the exception of Common and a little Outkast.

**Cyclonepride** · 07-19-2009, 02:15 PM

No sex, drugs, alcohol references or cussing. As they get older, they're going to hear those things, so I've loosened up a little as my boy has gotten older. The key thing I've let him know is that hearing those things said is a lot different than using those words himself. I've also let him know that he has a free pass to ask me about what any word means, or about anything for that matter, so that we can have an open discussion about it.

**balken** · 07-19-2009, 02:18 PM

I would play the a lot off of Eddie Murphy's "How Could It Be" featuring the hit song "Party All the Time." Also, consider picking up some old Tony Randall albums or perhaps some Richard Marx. Do not, however, let the child see any images of Richard Marx under any circumstances.

**AIT** · 07-19-2009, 02:20 PM

My kids only listen to children music. It's not that I don't let them listen to anything else, but they demand to hear their music instead of my garbage. Their music is annoying, but it's better than listening to them complain.

When I listen to music with the kids, I'm mostly concerned with language. I think they have to be a few years old before they pick up on themes in the lyrics. I don't listen to much hard music, but I'd be concerned that just the music would be too intense for them.

A friend told me he felt really guilty when he was browsing his parents' music collection one day, and realized that they stopped adding to it about the time he was born.

**CycloneNick** · 07-19-2009, 02:23 PM

Originally Posted by Cyclonepride

No sex, drugs, alcohol references or cussing. As they get older, they're going to hear those things, so I've loosened up a little as my boy has gotten older. The key thing I've let him know is that hearing those things said is a lot different than using those words himself. I've also let him know that he has a free pass to ask me about what any word means, or about anything for that matter, so that we can have an open discussion about it.

At first I thought a good measuring stick was whether it was played on the radio, then I realized I don't have a whole lot that is played on the radio anymore, because most of what is on the radio is garbage.

Thanks Cyclonepride...good guidelines.

**TarHeelHawk** · 07-19-2009, 02:24 PM

Originally Posted by AIT

My kids only listen to children music. It's not that I don't let them listen to anything else, but they demand to hear their music instead of my garbage. Their music is annoying, but it's better than listening to them complain.

When I listen to music with the kids, I'm mostly concerned with language. I think they have to be a few years old before they pick up on themes in the lyrics. I don't listen to much hard music, but I'd be concerned that just the music would be too intense for them.

A friend told me he felt really guilty when he was browsing his parents' music collection one day, and realized that they stopped adding to it about the time he was born.

That got me thinking....my Mom still has ABBA records, and pretty much did the same thing when my brother and I showed up - stopped adding to it.

As soon as I left for Basic Training, they started adding to it again.

**TarHeelHawk** · 07-19-2009, 02:26 PM

Originally Posted by CycloneNick

So we're expecting our first child anytime now and I spent some time today going through my music library and sanitizing it for his little ears.

I was wondering where everyone else stood on what they let their kids hear.
I've pretty much removed all rap with the exception of Common and a little Outkast.

This is totally unrelated to what you're asking, but it might save you some money. If you haven't gone out and bought bottles yet (for formula, breast milk, etc), but the bigger 8 ounce bottles instead of the 4 ounce bottles.

The little one will graduate to the bigger bottle in around 6 weeks, so I found it pointless to buy the smaller ones.

**AIT** · 07-19-2009, 02:32 PM

Originally Posted by TarHeelHawk

That got me thinking....my Mom still has ABBA records, and pretty much did the same thing when my brother and I showed up - stopped adding to it.

As soon as I left for Basic Training, they started adding to it again.

I'm close to the point of not adding any new music. I'm only buying a few albums a year, and mostly from artists I liked before I had kids. I just don't have much time to listen to music any more.

**AIT** · 07-19-2009, 02:36 PM

Originally Posted by CycloneNick

At first I thought a good measuring stick was whether it was played on the radio, then I realized I don't have a whole lot that is played on the radio anymore, because most of what is on the radio is garbage.

Thanks Cyclonepride...good guidelines.

There's plenty of music on the radio that I don't want my kids to listen to, plus all the strip club ads get pretty obnoxious. For reference, my kids are 5 and 3, so I'll loosen up as they get older. Probably.

**cyrevkah** · 07-19-2009, 02:44 PM

I don't remember any rules for the radio growing up, but we had free run of dad's record collection! I remember playing Beatles, Somther's Brothers, and a lot of classics.

**CycloneNick** · 07-19-2009, 03:49 PM

Originally Posted by cyrevkah

I don't remember any rules for the radio growing up, but we had free run of dad's record collection! I remember playing Beatles, Somther's Brothers, and a lot of classics.

I will definitely make the Beastie Boys available to him!

**GeronimusClone** · 07-19-2009, 03:52 PM

Plenty of Rick Astley.

**ST8BRN** · 07-19-2009, 03:58 PM

One of the things I really thank my parents for is NOT censoring the music I listened to/them continuing to add music to their collection. My dad is a music nut (I got it from him) and the music he listened to was a big part of my child hood. I remember listening to stuff like "Let it Bleed" by the Stones, "Running on Empty" by Jackson Browne, "Full Moon Fever" by Tom Petty, and lots of Steely Dan. Hell, I got in trouble in pre-school for singing "Free Fallin'" on Nursery Rhyme Day. To this day I have a huge appreciation for music, and it goes back to my parents open attitude towards it.

At the same time we were expected to know the difference between music/movies/etc and reality. Just because they said these things didn't mean it was ok for us to do the same, and we knew it. We weren't allowed to swear (and got in trouble for doing so), but at the same time my folks knew it was out there, and we were going to hear plenty of it. No reason to deprive us from the joy of music because the subject matter is just something we're going to be aware of within a couple of years.

**mkadl** · 07-19-2009, 05:02 PM

Originally Posted by CycloneNick

So we're expecting our first child anytime now and I spent some time today going through my music library and sanitizing it for his little ears.

I was wondering where everyone else stood on what they let their kids hear.
I've pretty much removed all rap with the exception of Common and a little Outkast.

My music was all early 70s and 60s music, protest, pro drug, anti government stuff, I am always kind of embarrassed when my kids have run across my old cassettes. Remember, chances are, your kids will grow up using the rules you set for them.
My youngest is thirteen and since he was 2 all we have watched is pg and now pg 13 movies. I don't feel comfortable with my family in my living room in uncomfortable situations. No, we do not watch a lot of TV shows either, same applies. I know what is right and wrong and so does my family. People should never let them selves become desensitized by constant exposure to crude language, sexual innuendo and blatant disrespect towards others. YES I AM A HYPOCRITE. Give me a couple beers and a few guys and those rules are out the window. Your household atmosphere is created and can have rules that must be followed.

**MoreCowbell** · 07-19-2009, 06:03 PM

My kids are 3 and 9 months. They listen to whatever I listen to, for the most part. I've censored some (hello NIN) because the three-year-old is definitely at the age where he remembers and repeats everything he hears. I also have a very varied taste in music, so it can be anything from current top 40 to classic rock to jazz and classical depending on what my mood is.