I think if this happened to me I'd take off on the bike and crash it so I could have a better story.
No kidding, and then to go on a message board and tell people about your stupidity (along with pictures). Granted, the anonymity of the internet makes that a little easier, but I wouldn't even want to tell total strangers that I didn't have a lick of common sense.
He may not be bright but hes a tough sonofa####.
If I tore parts of my fingers off I wouldn't be awake to take pictures. If I was awake I'd be running for the phone/car/doctor or something so damn fast I'd proabably leave a vapor trail.
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