Help: I’m going to be a father
- Thread starter CheapClone1202
- Start date
We're all perfect parents before we have our own kids.
The kids behavior in public and iPad use will be heavily influenced by you.
Parents play the key role. We set expectations and manage to those expectations.
I said for years to teams I managed that I didn't need kids...I had them.
After actually having kids I know how real that comment was.
He asks, jokingly of course. I think the last time I tried was his freshman year of high school to see if I still could. We were laughing so hard I am surprised I didn’t drop him. I got him up there though.
When our kids were very young, we were in a friend group of about 6 couples who all had kids ranging from 6 years old and younger.
I remember one woman who was about to have her first. At one gathering, she explained how she had purchased a small tupperware box for each outfit. She talked glowingly about how great it would be to have each outfit in its own little container ready to pull off the shelf at a moments notice. She also talked about how once the baby was born, she was going to start going on 5am walks with the newborn.
I very much appreciated one of the friends who had two kids under five who blurted out "Yeah, none of that will happen. That plan works until your kid craps himself four times in two hours and you're too exhausted to do laundry or even put all those outfits back in boxes. And walks are a good idea, but you're going to be so tired you'll be glad to just get to the couch most days."
It's hard. REAL hard at first. But it gets better.
Ok for real that's insane to think you'd put outfits in tupperware. Kids or not. That's logistically insane.
Bluey is amazing. Bow down before your new favorite show.
coach h had little coach h solo all weekend
we watched stone colds greatest hits, blasted 80s rock, and drank bud heavy while fixin sh*t
we watched stone colds greatest hits, blasted 80s rock, and drank bud heavy while fixin sh*t
My 5 year old likes Kid Rock and the Big Boss Man
Decked a kid in karate class, came home and hit some golf balls. Tried to drink a beer.
You take the wins where you can.
Organization goes out the window as soon as you get home from the hospital. Probably even before that.No,no,no it's organized.
If you judge my parenting based on how my boys act in public, you must think I'm a horrible parent. I struggle mightily with my four year old. I spend most of my time chasing him in public.
I have empathy. This isn't a perfect process. For any of us.
Kids don't come with operating instructions. And unfortunately they come with challenges that you need to find out the hard way. The good news is that they each have strengths that you as parents get to see develop and thrive.
One piece of advice...If your GF is staying home with the baby and you are going to work, do this:
For the first several months at least (even better if you do it for the first couple of years)...when you get home each day, take the baby out for a walk. Put the kid in a front-pack/backpack/stroller and do a 30-60 minute stroll in the outdoors. In my experience this achieves a couple of things. 1) Both of our kids were calmed by going outside. Sometimes they were stimulated and sometimes they would just fall asleep. 2) Most importantly, this gives your GF some alone time. VERY important for her to get some of that.
On a related note, if you have a fussy baby, sometimes taking them outside will solve that. I remember times when our son would not sleep. I would put him in the backpack carrier in the middle of the night and go for a walk. It worked like a charm for us.
For the first several months at least (even better if you do it for the first couple of years)...when you get home each day, take the baby out for a walk. Put the kid in a front-pack/backpack/stroller and do a 30-60 minute stroll in the outdoors. In my experience this achieves a couple of things. 1) Both of our kids were calmed by going outside. Sometimes they were stimulated and sometimes they would just fall asleep. 2) Most importantly, this gives your GF some alone time. VERY important for her to get some of that.
On a related note, if you have a fussy baby, sometimes taking them outside will solve that. I remember times when our son would not sleep. I would put him in the backpack carrier in the middle of the night and go for a walk. It worked like a charm for us.
I wasn't a good dad the first 3 or 4 months of my oldest. I was terrified and had no idea wtf I was doing. The second time around, with twins, "What do you need me to do?", or "What can I do to help right now?" were the two questions that kept the temperature down in stressful moments.
Other tips:
Other tips:
- ROUTINES. ROUTINES. ROUTINES. All three of ours had really strict eating/sleeping schedules and we rarely dealt with sleepless nights.
- There will be sleepless nights, but it's temporary.
- Find your "thing". If you guys decide to formula feed, take the feedings you can to give your lady a break. If she'll be feeding, once she starts pumping, take the feedings you can to give your lady a break.
- Do you cook? Learn how if you don't.
- When you burp your baby, they can take a solid pat on the back to get those burps worked out.
- Gassy baby? Lay 'em on their back and bring their knees up to their chest and roll them around like a little egg until all them farts come out.
- Sleep sacks/sleep suits were a lifesaver for us with sleep.
- You can swaddle that sucker up super tight. The tighter the better
- ASK FOR HELP WHEN YOU NEED IT
I’m a parent of a 9 year old that isn’t dead or hooked on hard drugs yet and I think many posters here will vouch that if I can make that happen, 95% of everyone else should have a pretty easy time of it.
