Speaking of which...I mentioned my brother in law (wife's sister's husband) over the weekend...he's a piece of work on this stuff. He was trying to make my wife feel bad for not being the cook in the house one time, and he said..."double ought...you cook? that's woman's work!" I responded that "Well, that's true, but I like good food, and I figure that anything any woman can do, I can do better!" I kind of locked him up for a bit there, because his sexist mind was conflicted on agreeing with the second part without admitting that it blew up his gender roles concept as well.
Same family...wife's sister stayed home with the kids, neither she nor my wife are very 'career' driven...they like having a job, but don't draw their value from it. Their kids are now 13 and 11, so they're in school most of the day, but she's still playing chauffeur for the 17 after school activities, and she does have a very part time job. Anyway, the 13 YO started talking about money, and how it was BIL's money because he was the only one that worked, and that all she did was sit around watching TV all day. I honestly had to hold myself, because we've been around them long enough that I just have to not start the fights...it's my wife's family, and even though she won't jump in, I end up the bad guy when I do....but I'm sitting there thinking "Either of my boys talks like that to my wife, and they will get a cuff on the back of the head and they'll be eating rice and beans for a week and walking their spoiled ***** to school....where the heck do they think they can get away talking like this?" Yeah, about an hour later, BIL comes up and starts saying the same ****....guess that's where. When the kids get out of school, I'll honestly be surprised if she doesn't ditch his butt and take half of his stuff.
I think if I ever heard my teenage kids talk like that I'd go full AP on them. Your BIL sounds like an *******.