44&2. Believe me..I can empathize. It sucks. What sucks even worse is my wife doesn't work..at all. I don't even want to say how much I'm paying.
I believe in magic
- Thread starter CycloneYoda
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44&2. Believe me..I can empathize. It sucks. What sucks even worse is my wife doesn't work..at all. I don't even want to say how much I'm paying.
46&2= Tool song based on Jungian theory. I'm actually the lesser in the divorce. And my lawyer is killer. I'm the one paying child support, but I'm the one eligible for alimony.
Don't know if you guys are in Iowa or if it's already decided, but shared custody is the default preference. I made it very clear that I would not accept anything less so I get equal time with my boy. The child support is also offset to an extent (you pay her for half the time and she pays you, whoever makes more pays some). Maybe good information if anyone is going through that or will be.
Cyyoda....just got done with the process with ex and my little girl.....not sure where you are in the whole thing but PM if you need anything....
Can't wait to be with my children tonight, hanging out at my brother's house ( in reality, he is my soon to be ex- brother in law, but he will always be my brother), eating pizza and popcorn and cheering on our Cyclones. I live for these days, I thrive for these days, I hustle for these days.
Go Cyclones
Go Cyclones
Not divorced but I travel for work a lot. Something I learned from my Mom who was divorced when I was growing up.
"It is not the quantity of time spent together but the quality". Make every moment count and make memories that last a life time. There are way too many families that spend a lot of time with their kids but the amount of time actually focused on each other makes that time meaningless.
This breaks my heart for you. I can't imagine how hard it is, and what you are all going through - I'm sure it feels like 2/3 of your heart is missing when they're gone.
My mom divorced my biological dad when I was little - but I can tell you that my memories of each are a lot happier when they were apart than when they were together. As hard as this is on all of you right now, you really are doing the best thing for your children in the long run. You're teaching them that an unhealthy relationship isn't okay, and they should want better for themselves and their children.
Best wishes.
My mom divorced my biological dad when I was little - but I can tell you that my memories of each are a lot happier when they were apart than when they were together. As hard as this is on all of you right now, you really are doing the best thing for your children in the long run. You're teaching them that an unhealthy relationship isn't okay, and they should want better for themselves and their children.
Best wishes.
Ok, I'm just going to vent here since we were talking about being divorced with kids.
I just got a text from a girl I just started dating saying that me having kids was too much pressure for her. WTF? I wasn't asking you to adopt them or anything.
I care about my kids. Eff me right?
I just got a text from a girl I just started dating saying that me having kids was too much pressure for her. WTF? I wasn't asking you to adopt them or anything.
I care about my kids. Eff me right?
It sucks...but i can understand it. It IS a lot for a new person without kids to deal with. The relationship alone is tough....but the kids, the ex...takes a pretty tough person that understands they wont be number 1 in your life all the time....but better to know now.
Wow, how sucky of her. Probably doesn't help much, but you are better off without her,
Thank her for it. When I was dating as a single dad, the cut off line was whether I felt like introducing them to my son after it got to the point where it would be awkward not to do so. Most of my dating consisted of three to four dates.
Yeah she seemed cool about it at first but apparently she's not as mature as I thought she was.
I understand it's something to deal with but I just wanted to date and have fun, not find a new mommy for the boys.
She knew I had kids when we were set up. I guess she just thought about it a bit more.
If you can't handle me having kids I'm not going to get serious with you anyways.
Yeah I got two dates in this time around. But I did finally date someone since the divorce, so there's that. Just gotta get find someone better.
She was a hawk fan anyways.
I hope we win tonight... This thread is depressing.
Also here's some advice: My parents divorced when I was 3, my brother was 1. Sucked, but my parents made it a point to never fight in front of us after that, and to never talk poorly about the other to us. They did as good of job of any divorced parents I've known. My dad drove 2+ hours each way for every school event my brother and I ever had. We were in a small school, so did everything, band, chorus, all sports, etc. He was easily making 2-3 trips a week during high school.
You gotta keep it professional and amiable, and make it known that you care. Kids will be fine as long as they don't get put in bad situations between you guys, and you show them you love them.
Good luck.
Also here's some advice: My parents divorced when I was 3, my brother was 1. Sucked, but my parents made it a point to never fight in front of us after that, and to never talk poorly about the other to us. They did as good of job of any divorced parents I've known. My dad drove 2+ hours each way for every school event my brother and I ever had. We were in a small school, so did everything, band, chorus, all sports, etc. He was easily making 2-3 trips a week during high school.
You gotta keep it professional and amiable, and make it known that you care. Kids will be fine as long as they don't get put in bad situations between you guys, and you show them you love them.
Good luck.
You divorced guys....you need to find some divorced women. People talk about the 'hookup culture' of kids...from listening to a few divorced guys I know/knew...middle aged divorcees are hittin' it the same way. The early '50's guy I work with was telling me how he was talking to a young married guy, the young guy stopped him mid-sentence to say "Wait...did you just say 'one of the women I'm seeing'?"
In the words of 2Pac...yes 2Pac
"Buddy don't cry, I hope you got your head up
Even when the road is hard, never give up"
"Buddy don't cry, I hope you got your head up
Even when the road is hard, never give up"
This thread isn't supposed to be depressing. That stage was 2 months ago. This is about strength, change, and magic. Listen, I could have wallowed away like many do, or I could do everything differently. I chose the latter. My wife is an angry, bitter mess. She is in Nickel &Dime mode. I no longer desire to point the finger. I'm at peace, and prepared for what is coming. One thing is for certain: I believe in magic, and I will find home, wherever that may be.
