I always give refs grace because they’re running up and down the court, trying to follow the action, seeing through 5 or 6 guys between them and the ball, and naturally are going to (unfortunately) blow some whistles assuming a foul is going to be committed even though it isn’t. We have the luxury of a bird’s view in the stands or on TV.
Obviously I want them to be consistent, but style of play and style of defense also make a huge difference. If you teach truly great defensive skills like Iowa State and Virginia, you are sometimes more noticeable when actually making contact. On the flip side, teams like West Virginia that just throw elbows and bodies around and hope they have enough depth to make it gets hard and tiring to call.